Here's Your Sign

I am sitting here watching the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. Jeff Foxworthy and Larry the Cable Guy do not let me down. I have been laughing so hard Mr. Frogman asked me why I was crying. When they do the "Here's your sign" I just laugh so hard because I find myself asking the same kind of questions and don't realize that I'm doing it until it's too late. I should walk around with a sign around my neck that says don't bother I have my own sign. Although sometimes I would rather hand a sign out to a few people myself.

My son is in a very good school with a great staff. He is autistic, yet high functioning. He sometimes needs extra help in different topics and with social skills. He gets help in other areas too but for the most part you would not know anything was wrong.

I have to admit though at the school he went to before this one we had a huge challenge. His first grade teacher kept telling me I needed to get him tested he was add or adhd. My son liked to act like an animal in the back of the room as she was teaching. I asked her if she asked him to keep his voice down and if he was listening. She told me no. I went into the classroom to observe and there went my son to the library area acting quietly like barnyard animals. She walked over and asked him to be very quiet. He did and she continued teaching. She got fed up at one point as he was standing in the window pretending to be a bird she looked at him and said, "Mr. Frogman, what did I just say?" He looked at her and said, "Which part?" Then he went into the conversation of what she had said over the course of the 3 minutes prior including what the kids were saying when they gave their answers.

This teacher who thought she wasn't teaching my son at all was listening to every word verbatim that she had said in the last 3 minutes. She still insistged that I have him tested. She had to be right he was hyper. Boy was she wrong! I didnt have him tested until a year later per my doctors recommendation. Alot of teachers now a days try to pawn off anything a child does as ADD or ADHD. They are not psychologists they don't know what is wrong with a child if anything. A teacher who kept telling me my son was hyper found out a year later he was autistic. She looked at me in on meeting and stated, "I knew there was something wrong with him." I looked at her and said, "There is nothing wrong with him only an ignorant educator."

Obviously this did not score any points with her or others on the teaching staff. But at that point at that school I didn't care. Throughout second grade even with a diagnosis from an outside doctor the school psychologist didnt do much of anything. Finally by his 3rd grade year and having become a squeaky wheel and to find that the psychologist had again misplaced my sons diagnosis I had become the intense squeaky wheel. The school psychologist asked me if he could evaluate Mr. Frogman and find out what resources he could qualify for. I agreed thinking this was a step in the right direction.

After all the observations and evaluations they invited me in to meet with 9 other people. The principal, the school psychologist, the nurse, the ot/pt teacher, a special ed teacher, Mr. Frogmans current teacher and assistant teacher, his first and second grade teacher and one other person I am not able to remember what position they were in and of course myself. Now if you didn't know the school district gets government funding for children with special needs. The school psychologist started the meeting and started by calling me Mrs. M. I commented that my name was no longer Mrs. M. if he would look at his file he would see that I am no longer married my name is now Ms. Kasey. He looked at me and without blinking again said, "Mrs. M. I have had the opportunity over the last month to observe Mr. Frogman in the classroom. I have come up with a schedule that will meet his needs to do this this and this. If you would please sign here we can get him started." That's what I thought he had said. What it was is he had identified the areas that were of concern and we were going to look at instructional learning that would support it. I was to sign the report and they would get things rolling.

Instead of asking me what areas of concern I had they were telling me what they were going to do for my son. This included input from his first grade teacher, second grade teacher and his current teacher.The more I thought about this I suddenly became angry. Here I had a group of people trying to tell me, the parent, what was best for my child. I objected and did not sign the paper. The psychologist again said, "Mrs. M...I have spent 10 hours with your child and I have found that he needs....." I didn't let him finish. I interrupted and very calmly looked at him and said, "My name is not Mrs. M...it is Ms. Kasey. I am glad you had the opportunity to spend 10 great hours with a wonderful young man. How does your 10 hours compare with my 9 years?" He quickly responded, "I do have a Master's degree in education and psychology." I stared at him blankly and said, "Well, I'll be. I don't have a masters degree but I do have one thing that you don't that will supercede your Master's degree." He looked at me questioningly and I looked at him square in the eye and said, "I have a birth certificate and that holds more weight in this meeting than your masters degree." He stuttered through to say, "Mrs. M....," where I immediately cut him off and stated that my name was not Mrs. M....and I am not signing anything." I stood up to leave wanting to yell at him......HERE'S YOUR SIGN!!!

The principal stood and said, "Ms. Kasey I think you are being hasty." I looked at him and thanked him for actually getting my name right. Then I stated that the meeting was over. If I needed anything further I would contact them. That afternoon I received phone calls and voicemails from 8 people. The psychologist didn't bother calling me, in my opinion he felt he was right. I was up against a brick wall at this point. I found the program at the school he goes to now....but there was one issue. The head of the Special Education Department whom had to approve my son to get into the program he is in is the wife of the psychologist that has the Masters Degree.

I met with the Head of Special Ed to visit the program. We talked for a minute and I made it clear I did not like her Husband and he did not like me. We were both okay with that, I looked at her and said that we were here for the benefit of my son, not her or her husband or myself. After that was settled everything since has been wonderful.